Random Dirty Joke
Dirty Nursery Rhymes
(Row Row Row Your Boat)
Roll, roll, roll your joint
twist it at the end,
take a puff,
that's enough and pass it to a friend.
Little Jack Horner sat in the corner playing with himself,
he stuck his thumb up his ass
and found his uncles underpants
and said "What a good boy am I"
Mary Mary quite contrary
shaved her pussy cause it was so damn hairy.
Mary Mary quite contrary how does your garden grow
I live in a flat you fucking twat so how the fuck should I know
Mary Mary quite contrary how does your garden grow
With wizz and e�s and ganja trees and coke as white as snow
Mary had a little lamb her cow had B.S.E
Mary was a kiky slut and give them H.I.V
Abraham Lincoln was a good old man.
He hopped out the window with his Dick in hand.
He said, "Excuse me ladies,
just doing my duty
so why not pull down your pants
and give me some booty."
HICKERY DICKERY DOC
THIS BITCH WAS SUCKIN MY COCK
THE CLOCK STRUCK TWO
I DUMPED MY GOO
AND DUMPED HER AT THE END OF THE BLOCK.
Jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana,
jack got high
unzipped his fly
and then they had a little fun,
jill forgot to take the pill
and now they have a son.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke a little leaf,
Jack got high and dropped his fly and Jill said "Where�s The Beef?"
Jack be nimble
jack be quick
jack jump over the candlestick,
if jacks so nimble
and jacks so quick
why is he in the hospital
with a lil burnt dick.
Old Mother Hubbard went to the cubbard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
But when she bent over,
Rover took over
And the bitch got a bone of her own!
Peter peter pumpkin eater
had a wife loved to beat her
smacked her twice across the head
fucked her ass and went to bed
Little bow peep fucked a sheep
blew a horse, licked his feet,
she ate his ass so very nice
tongued his balls not once but twice.
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt,
He's an alcoholic and I am too,
Whenever we go downtown
The people always frown
What a shame John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt
Twinkle, twinkle, little star
Hey baby have you seen the backseat of my car
With your legs up high
I'll make you cry
and make you forget where you are
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,
Her clothes all tattered and torn.
It wasn't the spider
That crept up beside her,
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.
(Row Row Row Your Boat Animorphic Version)
Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
69 a porcupine.
Orgy at the zoo.
Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Finger an orangutang.
Orgy at the zoo.
Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Eat a grape, rape an ape.
Orgy at the zoo.
Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck.
Screw a kangaroo.
Masturbate with a snake
Sunning at the zoo.
Fuck, fuck, fuck a duck
Gently in the ass
Roll around on the ground
Until you cum at last!
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