Q: What's a lion running a copy machine called?
A: A copycat!
Q: What's the difference between Simba and O.J.?
A: One's an African lion the other a lyin African!
Q. Why did the lion loose at poker?
A. Because he was playing with a cheetah
Q: What do you call a lion with chicken pox?
A: A dotted lion.
Q: What do you call a lion who chases camels across the desert?
A: a chameleon.
Q: What do you call a lion wearing a stylish hat?
A: A dandy lion
Q: What job does a lion do at a newspaper?
A: Run the lionotype machine!
Q: Why did the lions eat the preacher?
A: because he told them that they must put away their pride!
Q: Why are lions religious?
A: Because they prey frequently, and prey as a family!
Q: Where does a lion sleep?
A: Anywhere he wants to!
Q: What does a lion do on a canoe?
A: Use his Roar
Q: What happened when the lion ate the comedian ?
A: He felt funny !
Q: What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food ?
A: 'Let us prey.'
Q: What do you get if you cross a lion with a watchdog ?
A: A terrified postman !
Q: What's the difference between a tiger and a lion ?
A: A tiger has the mane part missing
Q: What is lion's favorite food ?
A: Baked beings !
Q: How do you take a lion's temperature?
A: Very carefully!
Q: What do you get when you cross a lion and a snowman?
A: Frost-bite!
Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field ?
A: 'Pleased to eat you.' !
Q: On which day do lions eat people ?
A: Chewsday !
Q: Why don't lions like fast food?
A: Because they can't catch it!
Q: Which scientist discovered the planet Leo 9?
A: Lioness Pawling.
Q: Would you rather have a tiger eat your or a lion?
A: I would rather have a tiger eat a lion.
Q: Why do lions always eat raw meat?
A: Because they don't know how to cook.
Q: How much does a lion trainer have to know?
A: More than the lion!
Q: Why did the lion trainer buy new clothes for working with his lions?
A: He wanted to take 'pride' in his appearence!
Q: What is a lions favorite cookie?
A: Chocolate Chimp.
Q: What do you call a cat with a lions roar?
A: Kitty Perry.
Q: Did you hear about the lion boxer?
A: He was always the "Mane Event".
Q: What do you call a lion thats a talk show host?
A: Larry King of the Jungle.
Q: What's a lion's favorite soccer player?
A: Lion-el Messi
Q: What do you call a lion playing golf?
A: Roarin' Mcllroy
Q: What is a lions favorite state?
A: Maine
Q: What street do lions live on?
A: Mane St.
Q: Why didn't the lion eat the detective?
A: Because he was under cover.
Q: Why do lions always eat raw meat?
A: They can't cook?
Q: What animals do you need to make a square?
A: 4 Lions.
Q: Why did the lion spit out the clown?
A: Because he tasted funny.
How does a lion stop a video?
He presses paws (pause).
A lion would never cheat on his wife. But a Tiger Wood.
Are you from Narnia? 'coz you sure make my lion roar.
Don't tell me a funny lion joke or I'll puma pants.
Don't listen to him, he's lion.